Ask Jeff Anything 9-15-10

Here we go again: This time, my fellow scribe Sean Ferrell (author of the disturbingly good Numb) submits a question clearly designed to provoke an alcoholic rage:

Now, if you’ll excuse me JEFF ANGRY JEFF GO SMASH.


  1. Sean

    You are a handsome man.

    And when I say “handsome” I mean “incredibly sexy” and when I say “you” I mean “me.”

    In other words: Me are a incredibly sexy man.

    And when I say “man” I mean…

  2. Patty Blount

    HAHAHAHAHAHA! My son came downstairs to find out why I was howling with laughter.

    Ah, the banter…. Very entertaining.

  3. jsomers (Post author)

    Sean: You grammar level, as always, astonishes me. I am astonished. Or perhaps that is the flushed feeling I get when standing next to you after you’ve taken your shirt off, which so often happens at the literary events we attend … in taverns.

  4. jsomers (Post author)

    Patty: Glad you liked it! It’s all Sean’s fault. He keeps provoking me.

  5. Elisabeth Black

    Best closing line ever.

  6. jsomers (Post author)

    Beth: I may have stolen that from someone. not sure.

  7. Adrian

    For five bucks, or a bottle of whiskey, I’ll even make sure the book in the tattoo is prominently displayed. Presto, you have a walking billboard.
    Speaking of alcohol fueled rage, where’d you develop the tolerance for that much liquor?
    Pantslessness aside…
    (Out of curiosity, did the Adrian you know get pelted with Rocky phrases day-in and day-out?)

  8. Smedley

    Honestly at the end of the day you’re both still authors who vicariously live through their works. I on the other hand have a superman cape from six flags. I like to wear it to church fly around the room during prayer.

  9. jsomers (Post author)

    Adrian: One, drinking is like exercise. You gotta work the muscles. You don’t get to my level overnight. It takes dedication and discipline, adult diapers and a tolerance for humiliation.

    No, the Adrian I knew had siblings who took a lot of the kiddie abuse off of her, as I recall. It’s always good to have weird siblings to block for you in childhood.

  10. jsomers (Post author)

    Smedley: Um … can I borrow that cape?

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